Messenger of Peace

I hate the Newark weather! Its like this indecisive kid who does not know what he wants and so, gets a bit of each? It was perspiring hot when I started, and all of a sudden, it was drizzling when I finished! Really? Everyday when I don't have an umbrella? On top of that, the perfectly fine Campus Center is being renovated, and all the food shops are closed. Do you know how much will power it takes to convince yourself to have a healthy, tasteless, salad, that makes your teeth ache with all the crunching? Then you walk all the way in the rain to find the shops unavailable and you realize the universe wants you to eat junk! So be it!

But then, Durga Pujo is just around the corner. And everybody has their own agenda :) Sugata da wants an excuse to take more photos, Atreyee wants everything, IB wants bhog, I, want to look thin in the pictures :) or, well, as thin as I can look, okay? Junk the, is out of the plate. Bacha kya? Subway.

Now, if you have ever been to subway, you will know what a pain in the wrong place it is! I have found a solution to the extreme choices laid out there. Just fixate on one sandwich, order it whenever you are there. A time will come when you will be a known face, and all you have to really do, is smile and say "Oh hello Jim, how are you today? I want the usual, thank you!" Heeehaaa!!! Anyway, I notice this hijab clad, beautiful, a little subdued girl standing right behind me. As she fumbled with Italian and Honey Grain and Oats and Wheat and Garlic Bread, I was sure this was her first trip to Subway!

A queue can be a great conversation spot. A little over three minutes, and I knew she is a freshman, here with her brother, who has a class later in the day, and hence she is all by herself, hunting for food before class. She likes a lot of mayo and a little oil in her sub, and has a strong weakness for tuna! I forget her name, but it was beautiful, starting with a Z, with a R and a B thrown in! I asked her what it meant, and she said "living together in peace". Kudos to the parents! I even cracked a little joke saying how she should be the brand ambassador for world peace.

And then she asked me where I was from.

Me: "India"

Z : "You like it there better? Or here?"

Me: "There, of course there"

Z : " I know the feeling! Ghar aakhir ghar hota hai!"

Me: "Oh damn, you speak Hindi! Are you from India too? "

Z :"Oh I am from Pakistan."

All I remember is how her eyes lit up when she mentioned home, how scared and lost she looked in that unknown Subway line, how she is also majoring in Biology, how i had a wonderful conversation with a total stranger, and how i felt she should promote world peace.

Trust me, that's all I am going to remember!

Love, Actually!

News today, has become a misnomer really. And what with facebook giving us the daily quota on what the world is up to, i guess "not now honey, i am watching the news", has long lost its credibility. However, you do get snippets of interesting news, now and then, that make going back to apna desi news channels quite worth it.

This was what I came across in IBN. Needless to say, FB had it too.

What really struck me was it was a guy playing the care giver! As a society of teenage/single girls will tell you, a guy is this and that and that and this! Not this guy, apparently! Holding it through, when he has every chance to back out. Fifteen months? What are fifteen months really? Are they really worth a lifetime of love the other person will not even reciprocate? Or express, for that matter! How long can you go without seeing the light in your eyes not reflected in the other?

Well, may be if you love, you can...but, I repeat, maybe...

What is this Love? Actually? Is it just one heightened feeling, or a culmination of too many varied, contradicting feelings? Is it the crazy, insatiable, drunk passion or the soothing melody of calm? Does it strike you once and leave you begging for more the rest of your life, or does it weave its magic, differently, numerous times? Is it the blinding of reason or the strength of acceptance? Is it the only reality, or the only folly?

I don't really want to know. Some mysteries are better left unsolved!

Couple Korcha

"we are the perfect couple...we are just not in the perfect situation"

Sokal sokal Fb te amar ek bohuu aager bandhobi-r status message e poRlam. prothome mone holo, "Aha re", tarpor mone holo,"What rubbish!"

Jodio initially amar raag hoyechilo tar nijeder perfect bolay. I mean, ek dike ami eboNg i am sure, amar moton hajaar gobechara, bhola bhala manush ache, insecurity aar inferiority complex jader chhayasongi, aar eder dyakho, nijeder perfect bolte ekbaar badheo na bapu! kii demak! jai hok, ashol byapar ta onnojaygay.

What the hell is a perfect situation?

Amar Maa-r biye hoyechilo 21 bochor e. Joint family. Tay baRir boRo bou. Tay bor er mejaj Hitler ke o haar manay majhe majhei. Hyan, ekhon amar mone hoy tara shottyi perfect, kintu situation to kono din i create hoyni tader...tobe?

PaRa e pasher baRite Bubun da thakto. Majhe majhei o bhishon jor e gaan chalato. "Yeh teri aankhe jhuki jhuki, ye tera chehra khila khila..". Amra bhabtam etto jore bajano r ki dorkar baba? pore bujhechilam, gaan ta Pinki di-r baRi obdhi pNouchote hobe to? :) Bubun da ra baRi bodle onyo kothao chole gechilo. School koreche Dehradun e, College Bangalore e. Pinki di sei Rothtola te i theke gechilo. Around 15 bochor pore tader biye hoy. Perfect couple. No situation.

Amader school e poRaten Ajanta di. tar career ke tar in laws ra konodin i support koreni. sudhu onar husband chaRa. tar kotha te i Ajanta di baper baRi te thakto. school er kachei. or bor protidin oke bike e kore namiye diye jeto, aar chuti-r somoy niyom kore niye jeto. BaRi, na Nicco Park, ta janina :)

Aro erokom hoyto lakh lakh mohila-purush ache. keu baire chakri kore, keu judhdhe jay, keu hoyto fire i ashe na. keu hoyto kono din i fire asbe na. so what??

eder sudhu bhalobasha ta i ache. hoyto setar perfection er jor ei tara bochor er por bochor, nirbhigne, nirdwidhay, bina kono update e sudhui bhalobeshe gyache. kono tuchcho situation er poroya na kore.

Imperfection er joy houk !!!

Cloudy with a chance of Irene!

Hence Proved. There is a God! And He does at times tend to the secret wish-list deep in my heart. And with His signature, sarcastic style, decides which ones to turn into reality, which ones will screw my life upside down, entertaining him even further! I tell you, it tickles him senseless to see us in serious deep shit.

Now there are like, say 3-4 things that are always on my mind. Oh I wish I could go home, I wish a Phd would just drop in my lap, I wish I would be kilos lighter overnight, I wish...oh well, whatever! And trust me, I keep reiterating these every bloody day, with undiminished passion, making sure not a single useful thought crosses my lazy brain. But....mistakes happen :(

The other day, I was super pissed with a bit of confusion thrown in. People who know me well, will know how angelic, easy going and calm I actually am :) , so lets just say i was a little more hyper than usual. And in that merry state, I told Selina, "I wish something happens, something big and shitty, like it happens in the movies, and all facebook and gmail and telephone and everything goes off and life just comes to a standstill! All bloody problems happen because of the internet!"

Who knew He was listening? I could have might as well asked for that Phd! Yeah right :P

Jai Hanuman!

Sedin Planet of the Apes er notun movie ta dekhlam. Besh bhalo, jomat golpo, kono ohetuk ghyan ghyan nei, protyeker acting durdanto, ek kothay...ami dwitiobaar dekhte raji achi. Theatre e na holeo, porikkha-r ek soptah aage, ei cinema ta abar dekhle, amar ontoto mone hobe na, somoy er opochoy holo!

Jai hok, ashol kotha onnyo. Cinema ta-r hero ta ke besh ghyam dekhte. Sathe actress Freida Pinto. Tar choritro ta ke jodio Indian i mone holo, but naam Caroline. Anyway...puro hall e chele-buRo, sorry, I mean, meye-buRi sobai hero entry nilei ooooh aaaah kore uthche. Dosh nei. Eke medhabi manush, tate bhalo mon. Rare combination. But...point holo ami hero ta ke khub ekta patta dite parchilam na. Na, amar hormones sob thik jaygay te i ache..kono mistake nei...amar just Ape ta ke beshi attractive mone hochchilo! bojho kando!!

Chotto ekta chimpanzee-r boRo hoye otha, budhdhi-r sathe sathe feelings develop kora, sob nije theke bujhte sekha, leading to onyay-er birudhdhe uthe daRano. Sada matha. Kintu ki character. Aha. Ki intense chokher chauni, body language, decision making, baaki banor gulo ke chalona kora, nijer malik er proti bhalobasha show kora, maintaining his own self respect...ufff....ami jake bole floored! Sobai dyakhe hero, ami sala dekhi honu!

Pore mone holo, so what? Ei qwalities guloi howto ami purush der moddhye o khNujhe thaki. Bola bahulyo, motei pai na. Tai ekta aadim praNi r moddhye segulo eto nibishto bhabe dekhe ami nijei chomke gechi. Hok na chimpanzee, rishtey me to wo humare baap lagte hai, tai na? Ei jonnoi bod hoy manush pets rakhe. Amader moner moton manush jokhon kothao i paoa jay na, tokhon hoyto manush er shunyosthan era i puuron kore. Maybe. Not sure....

By the way, Ape ta-r naam Caesar. Anthony hole je ami kii kortam, bhogobaan i janen!

F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Another week and its going to be Friendship Day!!! There are a lot of days, weeks, months, being celebrated uniformly worldwide, and trust me, I am trying not to fall for their sweet charms, but this is one day I find very difficult to ignore! Ironically, my best friend thinks its nonsense...though I agree with him on almost all grounds, this is not happening! Growing up sibling-less, in a comparatively strict household; school and school mates were my wonderland! Every morning I would thrust myself into the warmth, the joy, the simple freedom, that only friends could give, every weekend I would yearn to see them again! But moving constantly from one city to another made sure only a few of those friendships remained. Initially disheartening as it was, I realised later that this ensured I was left with the friends that meant the most! Evidently, they still do!

This is for all of them. In the order in which they arrived.

Maa The person I love the most. Not because she is my mother. But wholly because of the individual she is. The first person to accept me as I am. Loving me, not in spite of, but for my faults. Constantly inspiring me, despite my regular failures. To be patient, brave, happy! And kindling in me the want to be her. Very her.

Didibhai Proof that two entirely opposite individuals can go along perfectly :)

Devanshi You make friends. And then, you make friends when you think you are growing up. a time when you have an opinion on everything, and all your impulses, decisions, feelings...seem the best and the most correct. At this time, you find someone who thinks like you. Years pass by, and you realise you were oh so wrong. And that its possible that you may never be right. In the total mayhem that is produced in the head, you look up to find the same person, going through the same shit, with the exact same guts and elegance, making it impossible for the world to know how deeply messed up you might be! For all this, and for making me realise that two girls, can indeed be friends....I love you!

Nivedan The biggest high of life is probably when you realise you know someone inside out. And not judge them. To know that this person will not remotely try to be someone else, under any goddamn situation, if you are at the receiving end. To understand that, he puts all his under achievements, flaws, shortcomings, under your scrutiny and goes away to enjoy life...knowing that you are, and will always be there. To see that the faith runs so deep, it can reach a point where his life merges into yours...and you forget when that happened. To believe that the world may go, vanish, die, cheat, lie, sleep....someone is always there. Wide wide awake.

Jaimeen Every girl needs a guy who understands her feminine misgivings and yet not laugh at them. Someone who can listen to all that is too sensitive to be shared with another girl, and too confusing for a boy to understand. Someone who can call/ping/mail you when you instinctively miss them, and soothe your fears that no technology can replace the dil ka rishta. Someone you can have pink drinks with, and can get overly emotional without the fear of being misread. Someone who does not consider you his closest friend, and nor do you....but feel exactly the equal amount of love and compassion. Its scary, and so beautiful!

Baba Hochche. hote hote hoye jabe :)

A few others who are not yet there....but oh so badly I want them!!

To all of you, and to them, and of course to my biggest and sometimes the only friend, me, I wish a very very happy friendship day!!!

To Bombay...

Baby, I miss you. Come take me back!